How did a computer scientist such as Geoffrey Hinton manage to win a Nobel Prize in physics when computer science already has its own Nobel Prize equivalent in the Turing Awards?

(Mumbles of assent)

Whatever.

A fly on the wall at the Royal Swedish Academy of Sciences

What are the primary causes of the persistent smog crisis affecting Delhi and other parts of North India?

"Good point, I'm sure we can swing it. And let's tack on Hopfield while we're about it."

[The basic structure of artificial neural networks] has close similarities with spin models in statistical physics applied to magnetism or alloy theory. This year’s Nobel Prize in Physics recognizes research exploiting this connection to make breakthrough methodological advances in the field of ANN.

Whatever.

Why did Cartman love Heidi purely with heart, her being the first one he ever did, but then one day Butters tells him that all women are manipulative and then he began to believe that she was a bad person and pretended to be a victim?

"Hey guys, AI is pretty big so let's centre our prizes on it this year. We can get some attention, and it's all about advertising, at the end of the day, isn't it?"

^† They rationalise their decision thusly:

… then anything is possible. There’s no rule that a Nobel Prize has to make sense.^*

Have you ever had sex with your female cousin? How did it start?

Fortunately, we are privy to the discussion that led up to this:

Why wait any longer for the one you love?

[Older voice] "Mmm. What about Hinton, he's widely regarded? Nobody got fired for buying IBM"

Why cant I stop thinking about counsellor between sessions?

There you go.^†

They then move on to selectively provide their own version of history. But hey, it’s OK. They wanted controversy, didn’t they? Whatever.

"Good idea, but how can we wangle something that says 'Physics'?"

Why do Trumpers and MAGA Republicans care who is trans and who is gay ECT? If they didn't have a personal interest in transgenderism it shouldn't matter so much then, right?

"Naah, Linnainmaa is a Finn. Can't give it to a bloody Finnish mathematician. Let's go for drinks. Brännvin anyone?"

"Where can we shoehorn it in? Chemistry is easy 'cos AlphaFold; but what about physics? A bit more challenging, right?"

[Younger voice] "But wait a minute, Ising-Lenz goes back to the 1920's. And didn't Hinton plagiarise rather a lot? He also didn't invent modern backprop, did he, that's Linnainmaa? And Amari preceded Hopfield, too. That's not a good look."

Have you ever followed through being bi-curious?

In awarding prizes, the Nobel Committees often seem only marginally more competent than MTG is at explaining meteorology. And if they can give a literature prize for lyrics like:

You can have your cake and eat it too

When he's standing, in front of you

I'm pretty sure that my dog is transgender, how would I go about transitioning it?

^* Fibiger got the 1926 Medicine prize for the discovery of Spiroptera carcinoma (Don’t ask).

(Bob Dylan, Nobel Prize for Literature, 2016)

"Didn't he do something with Boltzmann in it? That sounds physics-y. RBMs and stuff, eh?"

What are the signs that a guy wants to marry you but is afraid of commitment or does not want to get married at all?

In December 1973, when Kissinger was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, comedian Tom Lehrer dropped his mic and stamped on it—satire had just died.

Why wait any longer for the world to begin?

My 11 million SEK, Dr Jo.

What do you think about Vivian Jenna Wilson's decision to speak out against her father, Elon Musk, in a public interview with NBC News?